by John Butcher, MSW, RSW
(Reprinted with permission from "Perspectives", Vol 15 #9, September 1993 - BC Association of Social Workers. John Butcher is the director of the Lax Kw'allams Family Counselling Centre, Port Simpson, BC. He works extensively with survivors of sexual victimization.)
Reclaim Your Self is an 83 page self help guide for survivors of sexual abuse. I have found this manual to be very useful both as an adjunct to on-going therapy, and in helping survivors with the decision of whether on-going long-term therapy is necessary. The author, Bill Davidson, has over 20 years experience in working with survivors, perpetrators and families where sexual victimization has occurred. He is a firm believer in individuals' power to heal, in some cases, without therapy.
As a result, this manual goes to great efforts to de-mystify the thought processes, feelings, thinking patterns, fear, secrecy, depression and anger, commonly experienced by people who have been sexually victimized. The negative stigma attached to these feelings is fully explained, resulting in a lessening of the debilitating effect on the person, e.g. "as your healing takes place, there will likely be some anger-creating thought patterns surface", "your ability to tolerate frustration may have done a disappearing act", "if this is happening to you, congratulations, you are no longer suppressing your anger".
However, the manual does not stop there. It gives concrete examples of how to deal with these emotions. One individual was caught in the double-bind of believing that hate is a sin. Like many survivors who hold strong religious beliefs, she was unable to honour her feelings of hate towards her abuser, having been told that she must forgive him. Through challenging this belief she was able to handle her situation this way; "who are these people who speak for God and say that I can handle my victimization perfectly, maybe I will forgive one day and maybe I won't, who speaks for God and says that God cannot understand what has happened to me? God can handle what has happened." This manual is easy to read and is organized in small sections, with logical progression. A table of contents makes them easy to find for reference. It is written with the effective combination of knowledge, humour, empathy and common sense. While intended as a self help manual, the author effectively outlines situations where professional assistance is strongly encouraged, and where to find these resources.
If you are looking for a scholarly study based primarily on research and theory, then this manual is definitely not for you. However, if you are in search of a tool both you and your clients can use, this manual more than fits the bill.